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Confessions of a Former Cool Hip Dancer, Part 2: You Only Get What You Give

7/15/2013

 
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The older I get, the more I’m convinced that adulthood is at least partly about finding your community -- be it the members of your household or your “tribe” that you hang out with. When I left off in Part 1, I’d found mine, and it was awesome.

A couple of years later (circa 2010) my body started to decide that it was no longer willing to be as cooperative as it had been to date. I had a lengthy battle with bronchitis (that wasn’t diagnosed as such until a couple of months in), my other knee decided that it would start filing grievances with my body on a regular basis and as such I needed to wear another knee brace, and then later my lower back did something weird in late 2011/early 2012 that has meant my deep-dipping days are mostly behind me at this point, with rare exceptions (but man, they were fun while they lasted).

A little later on, I was saving up for a trip abroad and was unsteadily employed, so the trips to the diner fell away in the name of saving money. Unfortunately, the ongoing health issues also meant that I couldn’t keep up with the hot-shot line anymore, at least not consistently. I started dancing in the other lines more regularly, and meeting new folks that way (including a few who made surprised comments that I wasn’t dancing over in the far line). A few of the folks I used to dance with in the cool hip dancer line still sought me out, but most of them stayed over in the cool hip dancer line, dancing with each other, and I didn’t get to see them unless there was a gender imbalance, I was sitting out, and they were scraping the sides of the room for partners.

I'll be blunt: at first, this really stung. The folks I had thought were my friends didn’t ask to dance with me anymore, and they no longer even asked if I wanted to go to the diner anymore. I actually considered quitting contra at that point, since a lot of the appeal had been that community and my inclusion in it.

Somewhere around this point I was having a pity party for myself (complete with tiny violin solo) and Steve metaphorically smacked me upside the head: “When was the last time you asked them for a dance?”

Took me a little bit, but as much as I hated to admit it, he was right. In waiting for them to ask me, I’d been taking on a really awful attitude, and that was really not helping anything at all. Who the heck was I to demand that they bridge the gap instead of attempting to do so myself? They certainly didn’t owe me anything and while I certainly hadn’t thought of it that way, I could see where this interpretation of my lament had some legs. After this forehead-smacking “Aha!” moment, I resolved to make more of a point of seeking them out at least some of the time, instead of waiting for them to come to me like they had before.

It’s harder to get dances with a lot of the folks who used to be my regular partners as a lot of them book way ahead these days, and I’m pretty sure I pushed some of them away when I stopped going to the diner/stopped dancing in the far-left line because of the aforementioned bodily rebellion, but the frequency of my being able to dance with those friends went up once I got over myself and went over and asked them, rather than waiting for them to ask me most of the time. (There are some that I finally wrote off asking after being deferred indefinitely several weeks in a row -- I can take a hint, and I didn’t and don’t want to be a pest -- but many I still dance with at least sometimes.)

After six years and counting of dancing, even after the health issues resolved, I have unfortunately never been able to get my 22-year-old body back. Consequently, I now frequently steer folks I used to dance with into other lines where I run into less consistently vigorous/flourishy neighbors, but when I head over to the really vigorous line, I make a point of being able to keep up -- and I try and make a point of asking the folks who usually dance there to partner me as well. I’m accepting this in the interest of being able to dance for many more years (hopefully with at least some flourishes thrown in) and remain active in the contra community.

In the meantime, I’ve expanded my circle of “regular partners” and that’s all been to the better -- just through partnering them, the not-flourishy dancers are teaching me style points among other things, too, which are actually making me a better flourisher when I dance with the flourishy folks. We nurture the connections in different ways, kind of like when you have some friends you go hiking with, and others you go see movies with.

At this point I’ve established myself enough as a dancer who doesn’t have a “usual” line anymore that I’ve stopped getting the “what are you doing over here?” questions. I’ve been able to make more friends who aren’t exclusively in that line and while it’s been ages since I’ve been out to the diner (that whole hour-plus-each-way commute to work I mentioned in another post saps a lot of the energy I regained when I got better, and I’ve come to accept that), I’ve still found other ways to maintain the feeling of fellowship and camaraderie that have made me stay part of this community.

So my story has a happy ending. But it’s also a cautionary tale -- before you complain that “the cool hip dancers” won’t dance with you, ask yourself: when was the last time you went and asked them for a dance?

(And incidentally -- if you see me at an event, please do ask me to dance, whether we’ve met before or not, whichever role you’d rather dance, as I’ll dance either one or dance switch. Chances are good that I’ll say yes to an invitation to dance, whether you’re a Cool Hip Dancer or not -- and I’ll be making a point of asking around, too.)

Related Link

  • Rebecca Brightly, “Why Aren’t the Cool People Talking to Me?” 

Techno Contra and Marketing

2/27/2012

 
_In a marketing class I once took, the professor talked about a "Marketing Mantra:"
  • _Marketing comes first.
  • Marketing drives the product.
  • Marketing drives the process.
  • Marketing is king.
_We've talked a lot on this blog about marketing crossover contra events to contra dancers, and some of the challenges that come with that. In fact, sometimes to get funding, crossover contra organizers have to frame it as an outreach project. This is all well and good (and generally seems to work), but what is the crossover contra community doing to actually make this an outreach opportunity to welcome more people into the fold?
_Terra Price talked some about how they did just that for last fall's Deca-dance event in Spokane, Washington, and it was apparently effective. On the other hand, I mentioned that to a would-be techno contra organizer while I was in Tennessee and she replied, "You mean advertise it to the gen pop [the general population]?!" while looking at me like I'd just sprouted an extra head and possibly a prehensile tail.

Contra dancers are a niche, and techno contra enthusiasts are a subset of that niche. There have been some really interesting stories coming from people who were DJs first and came into the contra scene second. And I -- as well as other dancers -- have successfully "converted" folks who originally thought contra sounded "too dorky" for them, once I actually dragged blackmailed brought them out with me. Word of mouth seems to be working reasonably well, but how else does one go find folks who aren't already "contra converts?"


_One of the main tenets of modern marketing is to go to your target and bring them to you, rather than just waiting for them to stumble upon you. To do that, you convince the target that you offer a product that is either original, or is better than the one that already exists. Right now, the movement is focused on marketing itself as an alternative to contra. I think we need to go the other way, too, and present techno contra as an alternative to the club  -- that is, somewhere to dance in a different way to the same music, rather than somewhere to dance the same way to different music, as you advertise it to contra dancers. Perhaps the folks in Miami and Saratoga Springs had the right idea, setting their events in taverns and (smokeless, at least in Florida) bars. Relocating the Contra Sonic series to Artisphere (a local arts facility) from Glen Echo Park did attract some new dancers. Having dances in churches and colleges and granges has attracted many people; could there be an untapped (and possibly underappreciated) market in taverns and clubs?

Genre Mixing Deca-dance & the Health of the Arts: Terra Price

12/19/2011

 
_Spokane (WA) Folklore Society (SFS) board member Terra Price took one look at the now-famous "My Cool" video and said, "I want that!"

"Not only did crossover contra look fun, but nothing like that had been done in this area. I wanted to have the dance, not jut for entertainment but for honor. For once I wanted the Inland Northwest not to be a decade behind the times. Also, I believe that genre mixing is essential to the health of the arts. One only need look back at any number of royal families to see what too much tradition and exclusion lead to."

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Only on the contra floor....

10/5/2011

 
One of the recurring discussions in the contra world is community -- how to build and keep the bonds between people. Contra dancers in general tend to be a pretty friendly lot and we also tend to be a bit quirky, which makes for some pretty awesome road stories, both at crossover contras and regular ones. I know there are a few times that I've looked back on something and thought to myself, That would only happen on a contra floor.

For example: a couple of days after Contrastock last May, there was a Contra Sonic installment. Some people were able to stay the couple of days into the week who weren't locals, so I got to meet new people and dance with them as well (yay!). A guy I didn't previously know who had been my shadow for a dance asked me for the following dance, and I accepted. We had a really fun dance, and when everyone was getting ready to leave, he motions me over to where he and his beloved are putting on their street shoes.

He then says, "My fiancée and I getting married in Massachusetts in a couple of weeks and are having a contra dance as the reception. You should totally come, it'll be a really awesome dance!" (I was honored to be invited, but I already had other plans that day, or I totally would have gone -- it sounded like an amazing dance.) I can't say that I'd ever been invited to anything related to anyone's nuptials after knowing them for less than half an hour before.

I know there are other stories like that out there. Please share your strange and funny stories in the comments....

Speaking of stories, in a few hours, Steve and I will be hopping in the car and heading north to Contra Evolution in Greenfield, MA -- it promises to be amazing with Double Apex, Perpetual e-Motion, Nils Fredland, Will Mentor, and Contra Sonic's own dJ improper all in one spot! Hopefully we'll get there before it sells out! (Fingers are definitely crossed.) To those who will be there, we're looking forward to saying hello and dancing with you!

Blogger's Soapbox: Crossover Contra as Clubbing for Folkies

8/3/2011

 
One of the advantages of maintaining a blog is the ability to drag out the soap box every now and then.

Specifically, I want to address my viewpoint on a common complaint about this whole crossover contra thing, that somehow crossover contra "isn't really contra dancing" because it uses non-traditional music.

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Food for Thought: Dancing Switch

8/1/2011

 
I was digging around online this evening (read: taking a look at Google Analytics to see how you lovely readers are finding this blog), and I found something really interesting over on Jeff Kaufman's blog, offering a couple of perspectives on why using "lady" and "gent" in describing contra dance roles is or isn't sexist.

This was especially interesting since we've been talking about dancing switch lately on the YouTube channel.

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Housekeeping Post: Call for Submissions & Suggestions

7/29/2011

 
Hi all,   Just wanted to take a moment to say hi to the new readers on this blog, and make a few announcements/requests:

(Don't worry, the Friday Flourish has updated as usual, scroll down.)  

1. I've been combing the Internet looking for people who have called/organized/spun/etc. various techno and crossover contra events. If you know anyone who falls into this category, especially those I haven't talked to yet (see the list on the right of the blog page as a guide to people I've discussed on this blog in some capacity), please send them my way.  

2. I am also actively looking for bands who are doing something nontraditional with contra music. Send them my way too, or post about them in the Forum -- albums or bands, either one works for me; I'll happily review the albums or go talk to the band members if I can get my hands on contact info. 

3. I've been hearing inklings about several private parties back in the late '90's that some people are saying actually might have been the very first spontaneous crossover contras, predating the Whipperstompers and YDW events in 2008. I would love to hear from folks that were at or organized some of these for a possible future blog post.

4. As we've been saying every week on the Contra Syncretist YouTube Channel, we're constantly on the lookout for new flourishes. Upload them or send them our way, and they may end up featured as a Friday Flourish!

5. I've got more features and pages in the pipeline for this site that I'm hoping to roll out later this summer, and I do take suggestions for same from the peanut gallery. If you have ideas, please drop me a line!

Techno Contra in the Broadcast News

7/20/2011

 
Apparently down in North Carolina they got local TV station WHNS to come out to cover one of their techno contras and air the story a couple of weeks back. Go take a look!

(Pleasant) Surprises and the Evolving Tradition: Caller Ann Fallon and Contra Sonic

7/18/2011

 
Right before your friendly neighborhood crossover contra blogger left for vacation, she caught up with Ann Fallon, who called the Contra Sonic dance in Arlington, VA on June 22, to talk about what it was like for Ann to call her first techno contra. Unlike some people, Ann had attended a couple of Contra Sonic events before she called, one before and one after the move to Artisphere in the Rosslyn neighborhood of Arlington, VA. She had watched a few format changes over the course of the series as well: “The first Contra Sonic I attended had several very long medleys, and I understand that some of the ones after that one had long medleys as well, one being an hour long.  The format at DC Contra Sonic has evolved to regular length dances, with the emphasis being on keeping to simpler dances with low piece counts so the dancers can just dance to the music.”

The experience of calling traditional contra and techno contra did not differ as much as she thought it would. “I was concerned about possibly losing my place in the music.  I’m not very familiar with the tunes used for crossover contras,” she says. “Although I knew that Jeremiah [Seligman, a.k.a. dJ improper] made the tunes be dance length, 64 beats, etc., and of course I know how to count beats, some of the music I had heard at the dances I attended seemed to have unclear phrasing.  I knew there would be an 8 count intro rather than the usual 4 … and I was prepared to count throughout each dance.  But it was easier than I thought to keep track of the parts of the dance, and …. and this was awesome … the dancers were so attuned to the music and for the most part were very experienced, they had absolutely no trouble hearing the phrasing and keeping the dance where it belonged.  So I began each dance counting rather than ‘feeling’ the phrasing as I would normally do … but I didn’t count for very long … maybe twice through the dance.”

Read More

Mixing and Dancing Toward Technophoria: Sheldon "DJ Shel D" Lieberman

7/13/2011

 
On June 4, Club Contras caller and organizer Brian Hamshar and Sheldon “DJ Shel D” Lieberman debuted Technophoria, a techno contra event that they now plan to expand into a series; while the first one was in Asheville, NC, they’re looking at possibly making it a floating series in different venues. Unlike some others, this series uses a seasoned professional DJ to mix the tunes. I caught up with DJ Shel D to see what he had to say about the experience and what drove the idea of Technophoria.

“The idea behind Technophoria as an event came about because of my experience at a contra dance where they ‘experimented’ with contra dancing to alternative styles of music. With my previous experience as a studio DJ (mixing music at a local radio station in Brattleboro, Vermont) I knew that I could professionally mix and produce a show, and take ‘Techno Contra’ into the mainstream of contra dancing. The prospect of contributing to the evolution of contra and be the person to set the new standard in Techno Contra got me very excited!”

Read More
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    This project has concluded as of mid-2013 (with an epilogue posted mid-2016) but we hope to see you soon on a contra dance floor! Meanwhile, head over to our Facebook page for upcoming techno contra events and other items of interest.

    The 100+ Friday Flourish videos can still be found on YouTube.

    Author

    I dance with abandon. I play with glowsticks. I look for music that is conducive to one or both. I play behind cameras.  I write about all of the above. I'm based in Glen Echo's contra dance community outside of Washington, D.C., but I'm happy to go dance afield when I can. Lather, rinse, repeat. Always repeat.

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