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New Dancers and the Marking Thereof

6/17/2013

 
The discussion about advanced-only dances last week made me start thinking about new dancers, and my experience as a new dancer in mid-2007.

The short version of why I started dancing is that I reached a time in my life where I really needed to get out of the house and so I weighed a few options in my head and some friends in college had gone contra dancing so I Googled "contra dance washington dc" and found Glen Echo. Unfortunately, it was a Saturday when I did this, so I resolved to go the following Friday night, figuring that if I made a complete and total jerk of myself that I didn't have to go back and I didn't know anybody there so it didn't really matter. Besides, it would make a decent story to tell later, regardless. (Actually, that last bit is the reason I do lots of things.)
So I spent the next week Googling all the information I could get so I would minimize the chances of making a jerk out of myself and I'd have some clue as to what to expect and what to wear and what to bring.  None of my friends were willing to go with me, so said knowledge would also probably keep me from chickening out at the last minute.

Fast forward to the following Friday. Got out of work, pulled my hair into some style that didn't require a million bobby pins but contained the Blonde Radius of Doom, changed into a T-shirt and a foofy skirt and sneakers like the Internet had said was normal for the scene, got my water bottle, and headed out. (The shoes dedicated to dance and the bandanna came later.) I locked my purse in the trunk of my car (except for the $9 admission) and wore my keys the entire night under my skirt so no one could take them and hoped my drink wouldn't be messed with in a large public space.

Somehow on the way in I completely missed the "new dancer" buttons (possibly because I was about five minutes late for the pre-dance lesson and I wanted to absorb all I could ahead of time) and someone actually asked me to be their partner for the lesson and I got through that and then it was time to dance for real.

And people asked me to dance and I made my way through the figures and I got really tired and ached all over by the end of the night -- especially my feet, and muscles in my legs that I was unaware existed -- but the endorphins had kicked in by that point and I was having a grand time. And apparently I either didn't make a complete and utter jerk of myself or I was too hazy from happy endorphins to care whether I had or not.

And about the only comments anyone made as to my relative newness was when a really good dancer I'd spotted on the floor asked me to dance about three-quarters of the way through the night and I said, "OK, but I'm not very good," and his response was, "Everybody starts somewhere -- c'mon!"

Well, OK then.

Over the course of the evening, I know I made some mistakes. I don't remember completely crashing the line. I might have crashed my minor set at some points.

I swear that there is a point to this story. Or rather, a query that stems from it:

During the discussion last week I started thinking about "dance buddies" (or "angels," or whatever they're called locally); the folks who volunteer to dance with new dancers and sometimes wear pins that mark them as such, and the blue buttons that mark the new dancers at my local dance.

Combing back through my memory, I seem to remember the same group of maybe a dozen folks volunteering to be "official" Dance Buddies, and a whole bunch of others who are known to dance with newbies (in a positive, welcoming way) on a regular basis but who do not choose to mark themselves as such. (I will confess I haven't paid attention to who's been wearing the buttons in a while. I don't, although I usually do try to dance with at least a couple of new folks in my evening as well as the more experienced folks. Some weeks  have more success than others.)

I also comb back through my memory and think about the folks who identified themselves as new dancers, and those who didn't wear the button but I found out later in the night that it was their first time dancing.

I also unfortunately know several people who won't partner new dancers except under duress, and even then it's dodgy.

And I'm wondering if it's actually a good thing that we're identifying those dancers. I don't know if I learned more from dancing with a bunch of people -- Dance Buddies or otherwise -- than I necessarily would have from wearing a button and having people be extra-conscious of me because I was wearing the analog of a "Student Driver" sign (except without the same level of risk of significant injury should the wearer lose control).

Or if my slightly-obsessive need to Google everything, like reading the end of a mystery novel first, makes a huge difference between my story and the norm.

Would it have affected my learning curve at all if I'd advertised my newbie status visually instead of just by how I danced?

For that matter, are we actually doing a disservice to newbies by identifying them as such instead of just taking them as they come and treating them as dancers? I don't have a good answer to this (the plural of "anecdote" is not "data") but I'd be interested in hearing opinions.

Is there a self-selection issue with newbie buttons?

Also, because I am interested:

1) What do you think of the above?
2) Are you a flourishy dancer? Do you think that affects your answer?
3) Do you behave in any way differently toward a "marked" newbie than merely a dancer you don't know (but who may have gained experience elsewhere)? (I'll answer this one for myself in the comments after others have had a chance to weigh in.)

Let me know what you think....
Doug Plummer link
6/17/2013 03:18:20 pm

One of my favorite pleasures is dancing with a contra dance virgin. I get plenty of endorphins dancing with the experienced partners, but I adore being able to give a good time to a newbie. My wife, the extrovert, will sometimes pimp me out to new dancers. I dance at the pace of who I'm with no matter who that is, which is the point as far as I'm concerned.

Jessica
6/17/2013 07:55:49 pm

In a place like Glen Echo where there are so many people and so many lines, I would think that the blue buttons identifying newbies is a good idea. In smaller dance communities, it's a bit easier to recognize who isn't regular, and to look for the folks at the end of the dance that look like they're looking for a partner.

For me, the further I drive the more likely I'm interested in dancing with advanced dancers, and maybe a beginner, but certainly not bad dancers, nor a long row of very low energy dancers.

Jennie
6/17/2013 11:40:18 pm

Back when I started dancing, no one had thought of the new dancer buttons, and I was brought by a friend who was an experienced dancer, who danced with me herself and gave me to the right people to learn quickly. Dancing with newbies is a particular joy for me, I love to encourage them and have made it a rule for myself to dance with at least two newbies every dance I attend, and sometimes I dance mostly with newbies. When people say, "I'm new and don't know what I'm doing", or "this is my first time!", I say, 'Welcome!!' with a big smile and ask their name.

At our dance we also have a group of men who are perpetual beginners and always ask new women to dance. I understand why this is, since experienced dancers rarely dance with these men, they have turned to a population available to them, new women. I watch out for women who are struggling or clearly feeling uncomfortable and talk to them about who they might want to try to dance with, and also introduce them to the experienced dancers in our community who dance with newbies.

I am definitely a flourishy dancer, when dancing with other flourishy dancers. But I don't do crazy stuff with new dancers unless they specifically ask how something they've seen is done. My rule with weight is to give back what I'm getting, and to always tailor my dancing style to the person I'm dancing with.

Perry
6/19/2013 03:05:27 am

Dancing with new dancers I think is very important to grow community. When I give my new dancer's workshops, one of the things I try to tell dancers is to absolve themselves of the notion that they should feel bad that they aren't "good" dancers and that they need not apologize for that. We KNOW that you are here for the first time and are learning to the dance. Welcome! Please have fun and don't spend too much time worrying about whether you are getting it right - relax and enjoy the ride.

We DO have some dancers who do get kind of teachy on the dance floor, and in some cases I wonder whether that helps or not. I used to be kind of teachy on the dance floor, but now I have come to believe that such on-floor instruction MAY be unhelpful and cause the dancer to believe that they aren't good enough to dance with us if they're not picking it up quickly. (It also MAY be very helpful, depending on the individual person I am dancing with - you have to "read" the person you're dancing with to know for sure.)

Dance buddies who are flourishy with new dancers I think may also be doing more to confuse new dancers than they believe. I'm a strong proponent of people learning and mastering the basics BEFORE they start to learn twirling. Especially during workshops. I'd like those ringers who join workshops to try to not be flashy DURING the workshops. Don't twirl out of swings or a ladies chain. Don't even twirl during a do-si-do. It's a workshop but some people like to treat the workshop as just more dancing.

As to "labelling" - it might help a little to help the newbies feel comfortable, but I really think that we should ALL be "dance buddies" by dancing with beginners - and adjust your dancing to THEIR level until they get it.

Ryan (blogger) link
6/20/2013 10:52:47 am

As promised, a follow-up:

I'm still a bit conflicted. I still feel like there's this somewhat anti-community message of "I must mark myself as a warning to others," this mark of "I don't belong here [yet]" to the buttons that I'm not sure that I'm exceptionally fond of.

With that said, though, honestly I pay far more attention to how someone moves than whether they're wearing a button (of any sort) or not.

Usually if the person is 1) someone I don't recognize (you'd be surprised how many other regulars you get to recognize on sight at a dance that has upwards of 250-350 people every week), AND 2) someone who dances really stiffly and like they aren't sure of where they're supposed to be (especially if they're to be my next neighbor), it's probably a new dancer coming and I'll do things like cut out the flourishes, make a particular point of being on time (or possibly even a tiny half-step ahead of the music to guide if needed without making them or me late), point to my shoulders if needed, or other such things.

But honestly for me, it comes down to how they move, not whether they're wearing buttons.

(And if there happens to be someone sitting on the side, I don't tend to be too terribly picky about whether thiey're wearing a button or not. About the only difference it might make for me is to guide them away from the "Cool Hip Dancer" line, but honestly 95% of the time, their response to "Hi I'm Ryan, want to dance?" is "Um, OK. I'm Soandso. It's my first night dancing," or some variant thereof (so I really didn't need the button) or if it's just someone I don't know I let them pick the line (and if they demur, head for one of the lines with middling-speed and middling-energy dancers).

dest/jess(ie)/etc.
7/28/2013 08:06:25 am

My home dance doesn't have new dancer buttons, but then i've never noticed a big need; even while dancing, i'm usually glancing over at other lines and minor sets, observing which unfamiliar dancers seem to be experienced (ooh! new toy! i should play with them!) and which seem inexperienced (ok, that one's definitely new, i'll give them extra support). Among the inexperienced dancers, i also try to see which might need a more encouragement to get out on the dance floor some more; sometimes i'm feeling too shy to ask anyone to dance, but sometimes i'm riding enough of a high that i can help lure them out, either by flat out asking or by quietly placing myself in their path while they're looking.

One disadvantage that i've seen of the newbie markers i've seen in other places, however, is that sometimes they make newcomers feel conspicuous, right when they want to blend in. I mean, we usually know who they are, but they don't know that, and sometimes it can feel like the pledge's button at a fraternity.

That said, i think my biggest ongoing concern (well, ok, aside from the ones that come with an equally new girl/boyfriend and have to be pried apart to go practice with experienced partners) are, as you say, the not-so-great dancers who dance with newcomers because they're easy to catch. At my home dance, where men are often more plentiful and not everyone dances both roles, some of these dancers can get awfully pushy about getting partners, and we're working on teaching newcomers that it's ok to say no. Some of them compound the problem by saying (and believing!) that they're good dancers for newbies, meaning that a newcomer leaves that dance feeling clumsy and dim, sure that if they had trouble it's because they just suck as dancers.

I'm still looking for a solution to this conundrum. If we mark the beginners as such, we can encourage them not to dance with each other and ask certain other problematic dancers to leave them alone. If we don't mark them, we allow them to feel a little less conspicuous, so they can make mistakes without feeling everyone's eyes on them. If we mark dance angels, we can encourage newcomers to dance with them, but then we have to deal with the drama every time someone thinks they should be angel-ed and isn't.

As for flourishes, yes, i'm flourishy, and i know it. But not with newcomers. With someone new i will spin one do se dos, mostly because it doesn't require anything of them, but anything that requires a response i leave out until i'm sure they have the basic steps under their belts. I try to lure new partners into sets with a lot of experienced dancers because i think a smoother dance experience will help them gain confidence. And i limit myself to one piece of critique per evening *for any individual*, given nicely with lots of praise when they get it right, and helping someone figure out how to do a step (contra corners, for instance) counts as that critique.

Ryan (different Ryan) link
9/12/2013 08:00:14 am

At our local dance (Cincinnati woohoo!) we have bright yellow buttons for new dancers and white buttons for everyone else (although most experienced dancers wear their buttons from various weekends...some of which are yellow). We're really friendly to our newbies, so often it takes some prodding to get someone to give up their yellow button. The yellow button helps them feel comfortable making mistakes until they figure out that everyone makes mistakes and nobody cares.

While those of us who dance regularly will be able to spot the new dancers because they're unfamiliar and the dancers who are less experienced because of how they move, without buttons the new dancers cannot identify each other. Callers often encourage new dancers to dance with more experienced dancers. While this can help them not ask their inexperienced friends to dance, it does nothing to warn them away from inexperienced strangers.

Ryan (blogger) link
9/13/2013 05:38:23 am

Hadn't thought of that point, where it IDs new dancers to each other. (Although oddly at least at Glen Echo I find that beginners do tend to clump -- whether they came together or not -- and I have no idea how much buttons or lack thereof might encourage that.)

Will have to consider this further....


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    Author

    I dance with abandon. I play with glowsticks. I look for music that is conducive to one or both. I play behind cameras.  I write about all of the above. I'm based in Glen Echo's contra dance community outside of Washington, D.C., but I'm happy to go dance afield when I can. Lather, rinse, repeat. Always repeat.

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